Today John wasn’t happy with my forcing him to watch a new movie.

How horrible could watching Ice Age for the first time be?

(Maybe your child is afraid of new movies?)

Anyway, he wanted to swim and I made him watch for 30 minutes to earn swimming.

He wasn’t happy about this, and made a really poor choice, in rebellion.

So I created a new intervention, rather than using an existing one,

(like peeling off a Taekwondo stripe).

Very precious thing, that stripe.

Rather, I made him sit in my lap watching the movie for another 30 minutes.

Yes, it did make me sit down (not so bad, right?)

And we watched a new movie, and I made him cuddle with me.

I even set the timer.

Mean old mom.

Maybe this might work at your home, for all kinds of reasons.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

One of the lost kinds of parent pleasure with kids of learning differences are too few moments of cuddling.

So we now have a new intervention, “Forced Cuddling”, to build those neural pathways.

We started with 4 minutes.

I said, “Wiggle, and I am adding a minute”.

John stopped wiggling.

Then it became a fun exercise in silliness and negotiating minutes.

John got to laughing and having some moments of happiness and joy.

The way it was supposed to have been.

And so did mom.

And we are building neural pathways for his future.

Try this at home?

Peace be with us,

Gayle

The house of John is often a field of battle.

Especially on rainy days.

Especially when other kids are playing with him.

John has become an unlikely predator on the dodge ball courts at Sky Zone.

And at home, it’s fair game also.

Any kind of moving play is OK—-more than OK.

Encouraged.

So, put your fancy stuff somewhere safe.

Bring out the Nerf guns, small balls, jumpy toys, bouncy anythings.

Game on!

Because mid-line crossover is anywhere you can find it.

Occupational therapy done right is so fun the kids don’t know it.

And joy in movement means learning and progressing.

Try this at your home?

Fancy vases are for someone else.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

The task sounds so simple to most kids:  Wash your hands.

Except when it isn’t simple.

For some kids, it’s a complicated process.

And too-many re-directs from a hovering adult kills the joy.

So this morning, as I was watching, I tried NOT to think about the clock.

I just watched him as he kept glancing at me in the mirror, each step of the process.

You could tell he knew he was doing every part right, and the joy was building in his face.

Then, he turned toward me and said in a #3 voice, “I did a good job washing my hands!”

I also got a huge happy hug with that smile.

Last thing he said scootering off to school 20 minutes later was “I did a good job washing my hands!”

Just in case I had forgotten.

It was a face of joy.  Joy as from the angels.

Watch for your kid doing such stuff?

Peace be with us.

Gayle

Recently, John spent hours in a small portable Mario Brothers heaven/hell,  for the joy of being with his neuro-typical peers.

Then on to all the other stuff that goes with a little boys’ birthday party.

Including catching pollywogs from the creek with a paper cup.

He even ate a whole piece of pizza.  (A big deal!)

Doesn’t sound like much for many kids, but it was a super sensory stretch of time.

And he wanted to because there were other kids there.

And out of his mouth came some of his very best sentences ever.

So, continue to encourage your kid community for invites to parties.

New sensory neural pathways can grow every day, if we give them a reason to stretch.

Peace to us,

Gayle

Boys like to shoot guns.  It’s a fact, I guess.

So here is an idea that may work in your world.

In the car, with the windows up.

Little boys who know how to do it are the teacher.

John is the learner.

The driver minds her own mommy business of chauffeuring safely.

Not sure if it is best practices, or just social “whatever it takes” for neuro-typical peer modeling.

But it is also sharing teachable moments with anyone who will listen.

For we are teaching the next generation of teachers, therapists, doctors, nurses, and other experts about our kids with learning differences.

In John’s life, his neuro-typical friends teach John how to climb ropes, shoot nerf guns, and so much more.

Active learning, kinestetic learning at its very best practices.

For both sides of the learning:  the seekers who both give and receive.  And sometimes vice-versa.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

Last night, John wanted to sleep anywhere but in his room.

I had to get up early the next morning, so not with me.

Not in the playroom, out in the open.   Too noisy.

He was in his room, lights out, and told me to go.

Good—we train for independence constantly.

Later on, I heard a very large squirrel making rearranging noises in the bathroom, but I didn’t investigate until I went to bed.

This is what I found.

Now, we sometimes play here, but very very very seldom is this where we start the night.

John won.  Mom lost.  If you want to call it losing.  (I didn’t really, because it was creative and solved his problem of loneliness.)

I wish I could tell you I elegantly relocated him, but the truth is way closer to dragging him by the arms through the door, into his room.

So, if you notice opposition in your home, if it borders on creative problem solving, kid-style, think about it as a step forward in critical thinking.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

Yesterday at bedtime my son was doing what he wanted to do.

Not what I wanted him to do.

So, I got out my secret weapon.

I laid the blow dryer on the floor beside John.

Thought I was so sneaky and clever.

John picked it up, started to play with it, plugged it in, and blew air all over his face and body.

Grinning so broadly.  So proudly.

We both started laughing and celebrating.

A former instrument of terror had just bitten the dust.

Of course, I had lost my best secret weapon.

But today, I wrote on his list that he could earn “playing with the blow dryer tonight” as a motivator.

It worked.   Two nights in a row.

I was afraid to say anything last night, but here on Evening #2 is proof.

How could this help you?

Peace be with us,

Gayle

Usually when John reads his (required) 30 minutes a day, Cop Mom hovers.

This morning, I told John he was in charge of the book, his reading, the timer, his breakfast.

I went upstairs, “to get clean”.   So we could go to Sunday school.

I admit I did peek from time-to-time, and I saw no cheating.

Instead, he read more loudly so that I could hear it upstairs.

Usually, he sandbags the reading by keeping it all in his head.  I can only assume he is actually reading.

Today, I heard it loud and clear.

He did rebel against 30 minutes on the timer.

Instead, he did 25 + 5.

OK with me.

And he joyfully got in my face to declare his victory.

I wonder how it will work for all the tomorrows?

Try this with your kids?

Another bonus has been the sheer joy John has learned—crossing off his things to do from his list.

This photo doesn’t do it justice.  He is excited, so purposefully editing his daily list.

He is becoming goal (checking-it-off-the-list) oriented.

I think that kinda counts, don’t you?

Peace be with us,

Gayle

John usually fights required reading.

Today was different.   He picked out the graphic novel (comic book) of “Inside Out”.

Usually he doesn’t share his quality reading with me.  I just get the bad stuff.

Today was different.  He lingered over the pages, talking, inventing, recalling, sharing with me, looking at me.

Not at all in a bad way.

He was in the flow.  Reading a comic book.   About some heroes he loves.

Remember the old Carl the dog storybook series?   Just pictures, you made your own words and story.

Well, if John needs to increase his imagination (AND HE DOES), then what he did today would count toward imaginary play.

Don’t you think?

So, maybe for our kids lagging in expressive language, try a high-quality “comic book” of someone or something they love.

Maybe they will make a movie in their heads.

That’s what John said to me, “I watched the movie by reading the book”.

Bet you find some joy also.

Peace be with us.

Gayle