So you are often sitting in the car, in the driver’s seat, right?

You reach back into the back seat to do many things, even lift heavy items.

Probably over-use your right arm and shoulder.

I did this far too much.

Don’t!

You will give yourself shoulder trouble:  rotator cuff, frozen shoulder, etc.

And then you will spend months in pain and rehab, more money than you wish, and possibly endure surgery.

Instead, let the kids do it themselves or move to a smarter body position.

Warning!

Do this in your car.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

It almost looks like biting the cone.

But not quite.  And Mom was nagging him to try.

For the cone is wet, squishy and far too scary.

So, it is possible to be almost 10 years old, and still fear a squishy ice cream cone.

And yet there is hope.

John loves to practice brave in the bathrooms where those blow dryers lurk.

And he can now eat a grilled cheese sandwich and a cheese burger.

So, some day soon, the squishy ice cream cone will bite the dust, and another tiny neural pathway victory will be won.

On the road to sensory integration normal.

Whatever normal will be.

So, keep encouraging your kids in this kind of stretch.

And if you have no idea what I am talking about, count your blessings.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

When you get a big cardboard box, what do you do with it?

Remember this old-fashioned idea?

And I just left it sitting in the middle of the room.

Eventually, John must have thought it looked like a comfy reading place.

What do your kids do with a box?

Do they earn it?

Or just keep stumbling over it until they decide it is valuable?

Some of the best ideas are the old ones.

If it is a little bit boring (or isn’t electronic), that’s OK.

Kids need to be a bit bored before their imaginations kick in.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

“So, do you get to keep the rope?” he asked me on the way out of the Township Development Standards Committee meeting.

I was there, with son John in tow, because my neighbor complained about John’s therapy climbing rope in a front-yard tree.

I started my 3-minutes at the hearing by saying,

“This is a sad affair.  My neighbor’s wife is a retired special ed teacher, and I don’t understand this.”

I went on to briefly discuss John’s interventions, mid-line crossover, primitive reflexes, building skills for the classroom, my role in community learning projects, and why I couldn’t give up on his interventions.

I said we had only 1 branch on the entire property which supports his (physical, educational) learning.

I finished by respectfully reminding the full room of two national laws protecting the rights of the disabled:

• Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), 2004, Part B, which discusses physical learning and physical education.
• Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) Amendments Act, 2008, which discusses how the law can be “interpreted broadly”.

(I have been prepping for John’s annual ARD, so the laws have been very weighty in my vertical learning curve these days.)

After brief discussion, they gave me the conditions of the temporary approval of my “improvement”.

So, on our way out, when asked, I got to tell him, “Yes”.

He nodded in approval, and I took it for a vote for Underdog John.

John did quite well during the meeting, and got excited when he saw his house, front yard, and rope up on the big screen.

He shook hands and thanked the men at the door as we left.

And, of course, he just had to make a poor behavior choice, so I had to make him “do it right”, with a small audience.

Oh well.

So, maybe this helps you when you face yet another unexpected teachable moment.

As John says, “practice brave”, and speak up.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

For 2 long loud days,

John has held together:

Good behavior choices at school, after-school speech, playing at the park with kids,  basketball & Cub Scouts Pinewood Derby celebration.

Two nights in a row, John has told Dad, “I want to go home”.

He was able to choose telling Dad instead of having a public melt-down.

(This hasn’t always happened, right?)

This is called “meta-cognition” (“I am thinking about my thinking”).

Let this encourage you to keep working with your kids for their self-awareness.

And then the victory of telling you what they need.

John and I practice this all the time.

Our kids can use this skill for their entire life.

Peace be with us.

Gayle

I just learned that for almost 4 years, I have signed ARDs by our school district putting my son in Code 44.

Section 7, Instructional Arrangement.

Code 44.  >60% in Self-Contained.

John has changed tons in 4 years.   His Code 44 hasn’t.

John isn’t motivated by seclusion.  He is increasingly motivated by his peers.  The Joy of Children. 

Neuro-typical peers whom he can model and maybe even show off for.

So, if you have an ARD and IEP, you have a Code.

Is your child motivated by inclusion?  Or seclusion?

My son is highly motivated TO LEARN because of other kids.  He really could care less about another adult bossing him around.

He’s had 24/7 therapy for almost 8 years.  He’s done with adults.

Here is the link to the new law. 

Here is the YouTube Channel for OSERS (Office of Special Education and Rehabilitative Services)

OSERS Home page

(and 1 link takes you to another link)

Don’t kick yourself, like I have been doing—-parenting of learning differences is exhausting.

Instead, be knowledgeable of what your school district is doing and why.

Kids change.

So must Codes.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

John is in the white oval, in the gray shirt, on the top level of this platform.

On his knees.

Just like me.

After so many attempts, John finally wanted this badly enough to overcome his fear and pain.

He yelled, “I made it!”

So, keep up with gymnastics, climbing, parks, gross-motor play.

That’s how muscles get stronger, and neural pathways get made.

“Play is the work of children”, wise people say.

Peace be to us,

Gayle

John in the red/blue shirts.

Adamant he wanted to wait OUT THERE.

On the parking lot side of the glass wall, with Mom inside the building.

He was proud he was out there, not needing anything.

What if he was sick and tired of always being told what to do and how to do it?

Secretly dreaming of ever-greater independence.

A balance of frightening risk and intrinsic reward, right?

Every day, I really try to give John more rope.

And rope begets more rope.

Peace be to you, little John the rebel.

Thanks to Alma Liotta, O.T.R., for the (hierarchy) Levels of Assistance (added graphics by me, courtesy of PowerPoint clip art).

But we have practiced.

Each time, with a longer piece of rope.  An imaginary tether.   And, a watchful eye.

But tonight, John (in the turquoise shirt) said he wanted to wait “right here” while I went back to the car to get a stupid coupon.

Also, I admit that I constantly make changes to what John thinks he is going to do.

Anyway, I decided to trust him in that little island of pavement while I scurried many cars away in the parking lot.

It worked out OK. 

So, I hope this helps you with something else to try—to practice a tether of independence for your child.

Not that you needed something else to do.

Peace be with us,

Gayle

A new skill.  Joy.

A set-back.  Fear.

When I step back, way back, and look at the bigger picture, it looks like this picture.

So, I better step back.

Feed the solution–the progress, the joy.

Starve the problem—the set-back, the fear.

Maybe this will help you and your child.

Peace be with us.

Gayle